I saw him today….It was harder than I thought it would be, to be honest, BUT I can feel the healing inside of me. He is so beautiful and sweet and I am grateful to see him with such a loving family.

My heart still aches for him but I know he is EXACTLY where he belongs and even though it is hard to see the good in all this, feeling those little hands on mine reminds me that even though this whole thing has been a nightmare (and nothing short of that), a beautiful little miracle has brought so much joy to so many people.

He is not my son, I am finally coming to grips with that, he was made and at first I thought it would tear me apart but instead it has made me stronger. I really didn’t think I could make it through all of this, but I am so blessed to have a supportive select few and God and I simply do not care what judgement anyone else has…. I am strong and I think that in time I am going to be okay.



9 thoughts on “Him

  1. You are very strong. Stronger than I could ever be. He is such a beautiful boy. I know you will over come all the hurt with time. That was one step of many on your journey but I have no doubt you are on the right path. You are so brave so courageous and strong willed. You will be an inspiration to many and do great things. So proud of you and you are handling everything very well. It will just get better from here. Believe in that.

  2. Im not sure what happened. But I kniw what its like to have ones then their gone in someone else’s arms. You are strong and if you need anything please don’t hesitate to email me.

  3. You are strong and the love you have for him is real. you are giving him the best possible world. And someday he will know you and love you for it. 😀

  4. Im glad you are getting to a place of healing. I know this decision has definitely taken its toll on you. But I know now that it was the right choice. Im proud of you sis.

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